(c) 1998 by Lewis D'Aubin, Keith Casebonne, and Chris Flattmann
Shortly after Chris Flattman joined the band in 1998, we decided it was time to write a punk song, as it was one of the obvious styles that we hadn't yet parodied. Chris obliged with a guitar riff mocking Jeff King's once and future punk band Converts (Jeff was friends with me and Chris, and was hanging around the lab quite a bit already.) After making up a drum part, I upped the ante by introducing ridiculous lyrics about Vikings drinking MILK. We introduced the live version of the song soon afterwards, perfroming it under the guise of a newly translated scroll written by one 'Lactarre the Intolerant', correcting a long held misconception that it was MEADE (actually a favorite beverage of mine) that the Vikings drank before battle. The trumpet part is actually based on an old keyboard riff that I made up on my Casio SK-1 when I was in high school, originally part of a song called 'Corona'. So the liquid lineage of the song has remained...
Recording the song was fairly straightforward, though it took me an entire evening to get the off -kilter majesty in the vocals that I craved. Little guest parts throughout by the Krazed Archer (Charlie Tuminello) and a gang vocal stacked up by yours truly added to the madness. Since this song dates back to the Wissenschaft era, it actually still has some of Keith's guitar tracks on it way in the background, retained for thickness, with Jeff's Washburn guitar slicing through the mix.
The trumpet parts were first demoed on keyboard, but I desired a REAL trumpet playing the parts, so I asked everyone I knew and finally found a friend who did and still had his trumpet from high school - Ed Merilh, a co-worker of mine, cover band guitarist (and future lead guitarist of the C.O.G.!) It took a day for him to get his rusty chops back in order, but he was finally able to come through and play the part, recorded remotely at his band's practice space. Sadly, he sold the trumpet a couple months later.
After almost all was said and done, I decided that the midi drums were a little too mechanical, and replaced the snare part with a live snare drum, heavily limited to give it more grit. Incidentally, the tympani is sampled from '2001: A Space Odyssey' and the church bell is sampled from 'Hells Bells'.
As a result of its hard driving beat and ridiculous, almost Monty Python-esq lyrics, this song has had enduring popularity. It was the first song to be played on the Dr. Demento Show, and was requested and played again and again (in 1999, 2000, and 2001). Still a lot of fun to play live, we have been performing the song with a tribute to KISS added to the bridge, melding the M.I.L.K. trumpet line with the fanfare from 'Detroit Rock City', while illustrating the sad fate of the members of KISS who DIDN'T drink their MILK!!!
Bet you thought we were going to tell you what 'M.I.L.K.' stood for, didn't you?
Drums...........drumbot, Lewis D'Aubin
Lead vocal......Lewis D'Aubin
Backing vocals..Lewis D'Aubin, Jeff King & Chris Flattmann
Special appearance by Charlie Tumminello
Recorded and mixed 1998 at C.O.G. Secret Lab, Kenner LA